Reviewing Movie Reviewers

It all started with the “Barbenheimer.”

And now, 60 days later, I’m exhausted. Brittany and I have seen 11 movies (in theater) over the past two months. After learning that movie tickets can now cost up to $20.41 (no joke), we signed up for the AMC “A list,” a subscription service where you can see up to three movies per week for a monthly fee of $21.50. Our mission, which we chose to accept, was to see as many movies as possible to get our monies’ worth out of the subscription service. With the period coming to an end, I wanted to answer three key questions about movie reviewers:

1. What’s the difference between the different rating sources?

User Based Reviews:

IMDb scores are based on a weighted-average rating of all registered users (meaning everyday people). This is supposed to give you a good idea of what normal consumers think of the movie. However not all votes carry the same weight, which was designed to prevent individuals (or groups) from rigging the rating. IMDb says they don’t disclose that calculation “to ensure [their] rating mechanism remains effective.” Like many other user-based review sites, the biggest pitfall is that most people only submit a review when they have very strong positive or negative feelings about a movie, which skews the ratings in favor of either enthusiastic supporters or strong critics.

Audience Score, by Rotten Tomatoes, is similar to IMDb in that it represents the percentage of everyday users who rated a movie or TV show positively. There isn’t much information available on how the final score is tallied or if there are any weightings. Regardless, similar to IMDb, this score is susceptible to review bombing or inflated ratings by franchise cults.

Brittany’s Ratings. Brittany is my most trusted movie companion to see all these movies. Not only do we share similar tastes, but we get to experience these movies together, which whether we admit or not, does matter. For example, the theater was freezing cold during Haunted Mansion which literally created a chilling atmosphere. Or during The Equalizer 3, the projector was out of focus for the first 45 minutes of the film, leaving us both annoyed.

Critic-based Reviews:

The Tomatometer, by Rotten Tomatoes, is a score based on the opinions of hundreds of film and television critics. It gives a quick and reliable idea of whether a movie is worth watching. However, the biggest issue with the Tomatometer is that it breaks down complex opinions into a “Yes” or “No” score, and takes the simple average. So if every critic scored a movie 2.5 of out of 4 stars, the Tomatometer would consider all of those positive reviews and give the film a 100% rating, whereas a simple average would give the movie 62.5/100.

Metacritic collects reviews from a broad range of critics and aggregates them into one “metascore.” The individual scores are averaged but somehow weighted according to a critic’s popularity, stature, and volume of reviews through a secret process. Several people still consider this the most balanced aggregate score.

Source

2. Why are the ratings so different?

Using the 11 movies Brittany and I saw over the past 60 days, we can pull out the following takeaways:

A. User-based review sites seem more likely to be impacted by manipulation.

  • Compared to a professional movie critic, individual user ratings from IMDb and “Audience Score” seem more likely (or easier) to be influenced by hype, controversy, or organized efforts to flood a score with either overly positive or negative reviews to manipulate the score.
  • For example, the “Audience Score” seems particularly unreliable. It gave “Haunted Mansion” an 8.4/10, a surprisingly high rating compared to Metacritic (4.7), the Tomatometer (3.8), and my own rating (5). The film was notoriously a box office flop, only grossing $24M at the box office during opening weekend. Could Disney have paid or influenced users to leave positive reviews on the “Audience Score” to artificially inflate the movie’s score?

B. Weighted averages tend to lead to lower average scores.

  • IMDb and Metacritc both openly state that their scores are subject to some sort of behind-the-scenes weighting formula, whereas the Tomatometer is based on a simple average. The “Audience Score” doesn’t say whether it’s weighted or not, so I’ll assume it’s a simple average.
  • The average rating was 7.28 for IMDb and 6.66 for Metacritic; both lower than the simple averages taken from Tomatometer (7.68) and “Audience Score” (8.45).  This could be because the former sites exclude (or dilute) outliers and suspicious reviews like we saw with “Haunted Mansion” in section A. This also may help explain why user-based scores for IMDB and “Audience Score” are so different; because of weighted averages.  

C. Critics often rate movies lower than everyday movie goers.

  • Critics and audience members often have different criteria for evaluating films. For example, critics often consider cinematography, artistic value, and other technical aspects. Audience members, on the other hand, may be more influenced by sampling basis (i.e. only going to movies they’re likely to enjoy and rate highly), herd mentality (i.e. if Brittany likes a movie I’m inclined to agree with her), or the entertainment factor (i.e. the number of explosions).  
  • This discrepancy was most apparent for “Gran Turismo.” Metacritic’s score of 4.8 was significantly lower than the user based reviews from the “Audience Score” (9.8) and IMDb (7.4). Brittany and I also rated the movie high at 9.3 and 9.5 respectively. On the other end of the spectrum, Metacritic rated the artistic film “Asteroid City” at 7.4, higher than IMDb (6.7) and the “Audience Score” (6.2).

3. Which rating service most closely aligns with my own ratings?

My own ratings most closely align with the Tomatometer, however, I don’t think the Tomatometer tells the entire story by itself. I’d look to IMDb first given that A. My personal rating is more likely to align with other audience members (rather than critics) and B. IMDb appears to do a good job of sorting out outliers and manipulation.

To wrap it all up:

Ratings don’t always make sense. They can be good guides, but the magic of the cinema is largely rooted in your own personal taste and connection to the film. My favorite part of the movie-going experience has been the excitement of being in a sold out theater on opening night, always having something to talk about around the office water cooler, and having a weekly date with Brittany.

Oh and Nichole Kidman is annoying.

Saying goodbye

I held onto my grandparents 2002 Toyota Camry a lot longer than most people would have. It wasn’t just a car to me, it was a symbol of coming home and bringing people together. Whether it was seeing my grandparents pull into the driveway, or being 21 and coming home from college to visit my parents, this car has taken me to, and through, a lot of key life moments. Unfortunately, all good things eventually come to an end, and it’s finally time to say goodbye.

My grandparents Clarke and Peggy originally bought this car new from Dyas Toyota in Auburn, Alabama in 2002 for $18,970. The car went on to live many different lives over its 22 years of reliably serving the Holloway/Kelley family. Its first chapter began with shuffling grandkids around, attending Auburn football games, visiting family, and driving between bridge club (Peggy) and the golf course (Clarke). My sister and I would tag along in the back seat and my grandparents always had to put down the armrest in between us as a physical barrier to keep us from fighting. And there was always, always, chewing gum in the center console, which I later learned was because my grandfather had acid reflux, just like me.

When I got to middle school, the Camry stopped going to the driving range as much and spent a lot more time traipsing between doctor appointments. In March 2008, the car took us to my grandfather’s funeral. Not long after, the car moved east as my grandmother moved into the Salemtowne retirement community in Winston-Salem to be closer to us. Her eyes were getting weaker around the same time I got my learner’s permit, so I’d drive the Camry over to visit and some days we’d go out for a drive with no destination in mind. But most times we’d go to Allen’s Dairy Treats since no one could make a hamburger as good as them.

In November 2009, I passed the drivers education test in the front seat of the Camry. Being a high school kid, I didn’t have a lot of money so my dad taught me how to do basic maintenance like changing the oil. However, I used the little money I had to put in a new radio along with a set of subwoofers in the trunk that I bought off Craigslist. That part didn’t last long as I blew the subwoofers by playing it too loud. Around April of 2011, my dad and I spent all day shining up the Camry in the driveway so it looked just like the day it left the showroom (nine years ago at this point) to take me to the high school prom.

I graduated from high school in 2012 and the Camry followed me to Chapel Hill. Around September 2013, I picked up my future wife Brittany in the Camry for our very first date to go to a play at Playmaker’s Theatre on UNC’s campus. Unfortunately by this point my grandmother had passed on too. Both of my grandparents would have really loved Brittany. Especially my grandmother– I’ve never seen anyone read as many books as the two of them. After college, Brittany left town to attend ECU’s Physician Assistant school. The Camry didn’t have auto-pilot but it could just about drive from Durham to Greenville by itself since I made that trip so many times. In December 2022, the Camry drove Brittany and I to our wedding in Greensboro (note we drove home in a badass Cadillac). And around that same time, the Camry pulled into the driveway of our very first home together.

This is a bittersweet goodbye for sure. Don’t get me wrong I’m excited to get new features like a built in GPS, but I’ll miss my grandparents paper maps in the backseat pocket, and always having chewing gum in the center console.

Homemade memes of Ryan and his friends

Where do memes start? And how does one become a meme? I’m not exactly sure, but here a few pictures that deserve to be memes and when to use them.

Meme name: “So we took a vote…”

When to use it: Send this to your friend as a firm and impolite way to shoot down their idea. 

Meme name: “Cubmaster Carter”

When to use it: When you’re a grown ass adult but your grandma still calls you her “little cub scout”.

Meme name: “Everything’s great Evan”

When to use it: When everything’s not going great.

Meme name: “But did you know… Bobby”

When to use it: When you need to mansplain something with your pinky out.

Meme name: “A Note to Backseat Drivers.”

When to use it: When your friend just won’t shut up.

Meme name: “Ball is Life”

When to use it: When you’re feeling too cool for school.

Meme name: “Crappy Day”

When to use it: When you’re having a crappy day, like that time someone took a crap on top of Brittany’s car.

Meme name: “Earnestly Excited Erin”

When to use it: When you’re earnestly excited.

Meme name: “The Dark Times”

When to use it: When anyone asks what Covid-19 was really like.

Meme Name: “UNC Basketball Fan”

When to use it: When UNC starts the year as #1 and then doesn’t even make the NCAA tournament.

Memo name: “Bigfoot siting?”

When to use it: When boys’ night out takes an unexpected turn.

Meme name: “DIY Tiger King”

When to use it: Any time someone mentions a tiger.

Meme name: “Mr. Manly Man”

When to use it: When someone’s style is so crazy that it just might work.

Meme name: “Gifts from Grandma”

When to use it: When someone gives you a gift and you have to immediately put it on and pretend like you love it.

But Did You Really Read My Blog Though? And Other General Trivia

Are you smarter than the 2012 Mount Tabor academic team? Or Zach’s 9th grade social studies class? Or have you at least read my blog posts? Take the four round quiz here to find out. My mom currently holds the record at 24/40 questions correct.

Round 1: But did you really read my blog though?

Round 2: Homeownership 101

Round 3: Rock and Roll Trivia

Round 4: Are you smarter than a high schooler?

Here’s the leaderboard as of 7/27/23. Let me know your score in the comments and I’ll add you to the list.

Who’s the better blogger: Ryan or Artificial Intelligence?

Artificial intelligence could soon put my blog out of business. But before throwing in the towel, who’s posts do you like more? To find out, I took some of my old posts and asked ChatGPT to answer the same topics.

1. What was the coolest cell phone in the early 2000’s?

Ryan:

The Samsung Juke. It doubles as an mp3 player, fits in your pocket, and the clock is reasonably accurate. The only con is that I’m not sure if it can actually make a phone call or not.

ChatGPT:

The Nokia 3310. With its physical buttons that required a Herculean effort to press, texting on the Nokia 3310 was like playing a high-stakes game of finger gymnastics. If you mastered the art of texting on this phone, you were considered a modern-day Shakespeare.

See my full post Cell phones have gotten lamer over time

2. What’s the biggest drawbacks of having a girlfriend?

Ryan:

When your girlfriend says her hands are cold, there’s a 95% chance she’s going to put her cold hands on you to prove how cold they are.

ChatGPT:

Forget about living in a pet-free home. With a girlfriend, you suddenly find yourself in a never-ending battle against her shedding hair. 

See my full post The Drawbacks of Having a Girlfriend

3. What’s the best household appliance?

Ryan:

The George Foreman Grill, as presented by Evan and voted on by the Revolution

ChatGPT:  

The Washing Machine.

It’s a marvel of modern technology, freeing us from the ancient burden of hand-washing clothes. It’s like having a magical vortex that devours your dirty laundry and spits out fresh, clean garments. But beware of the treacherous sock-eating monster that lurks within.

See my full post What’s the best household appliance? A Spirited Quarantine Debate

4. Which is the WORST apple-based recipe?

Ryan:

Colin’s Apple Cider, from my sister’s 1st grade class cookbook. Note this recipe has more sugar than water, and one of the ingredients is “one bowl.” Some of the other recipes in the cookbook included bizarre ingredients like 20 bumble bees??, raw eggs and flour (yuck!), and then nonsensical instructions like “cook at 12 for 11.”

ChatGPT:

Apple Explosion Delight:

  1. Take peeled apples and give them a nice roll in glitter. Make sure they sparkle like magical disco balls. It’s all about that glitz and glamour in our recipe.
  2. In a large bowl, combine the toothpaste and ketchup. Stir it up until it becomes a sticky, colorful mess. This is our top-secret sauce that will bring all the flavors together. Or maybe not.

See my full post The WORST Recipes From My Sister’s First Grade Class

5. Name something useful you learned from your dad

Ryan:

With boats, don’t ask how much it’s going to cost. You don’t want to know. Just do it.

ChatGPT:

Having a secret stash of snacks strategically hidden throughout the house ensures a constant supply of deliciousness. Whether it’s a bag of chips behind the sofa or cookies in the bathroom cabinet, be prepared for any snacking emergency.

See my full post Things I Learned from My Dad

6. Can you turn your craziest dream into a movie idea?

Ryan:

Movie Title: The Pirate from the Shadows

Plot: My sister Erin and I find out we have an evil step-brother. Because of a traumatic incident as a child at Disney World, he thinks he’s a pirate, and has been locked away for years in a mental hospital. He escapes and comes after our family for revenge, armed with a pirate ship and crew.

ChatGPT:

Movie Title: Chronicles of the Quantum Dreamers

Plot: In a world where dreams come alive and reality bends to the whims of the subconscious, a quirky group of individuals discover they possess the ability to control their dreams and enter a shared dream realm called the “Quantum Dream.”

Our protagonist, Max, a socially awkward math genius, finds himself trapped in a perpetual dream loop where he’s chased by a horde of rubber duckies armed with laser guns. Desperate to escape this nightmarish cycle, he stumbles upon an underground society of Dreamers, led by the enigmatic Dr. Lucidia.

Dr. Lucidia reveals that the Quantum Dream is under threat from an evil dream villain known as the Nightmare King, whose malevolent presence is infecting dreams with fear and chaos. Max, along with a colorful crew of fellow Dreamers, including a retired circus performer who controls dreams through juggling and a talking cat with a knack for riddles, embarks on a mind-bending quest to stop the Nightmare King and restore balance to the dream realm.

See my full post Ryan’s Crazy Dreams Turned into Movie Ideas

7. How badly can you roast my friend Carter?

Ryan:

The only thing more broken than Carter’s love life is his wallet. As a broke high school student in 2012, he ordered the market price steak and lobster, and just about cried when the $80 check came. Moral of the story, Carter, if you have to ask… you still can’t afford it!

ChatGPT:

Carter, you’re like our very own Fez from That ’70s Show. I mean, with that wild hair and those big, innocent eyes, it’s like you were plucked straight out of the Jungle Book. And let’s be real here, we’re not entirely convinced you know how to read. Remember that time in Spanish class when the teacher asked about your weekend plans, and all you could muster up was “uhhhhh poptarts?” Yeah, Carter, we’ve got our doubts.

See my full post The Roast of Carter Fields: A Tribute to 16 Years of Friendship

8. How much does it cost to have a girlfriend per month?

Ryan:

Grand Total: $70.50

May 1: Britt bought ice cream for both of us. Running total: -$3.50.
May 4: Britt bought me a cocktail at Calavera. Running total: -$13.50.
May 8: I bought ice cream. Running total: -$10.
May $19: I bought a round of drinks at Top O. Running total: -$4.
May 20: Erin (my sister) gave me tickets to a Brad Paisely concert. Cost: free! We went to dinner beforehand at the Loop. Running total: $5.50.
May 23: Dinner at Imbibe, I had a gift card so it was basically free. Don’t go here for food though… 1 star.
May 31: So this one’s on me. I really wanted to go to a Green Day concert and I think the only way I could convince anyone to go with me was if I buy a ticket for Britt. Running total: $70.50.

ChatGPT:

Grad Total: $220

  1. Gift expenses: $50 – Because nothing says “I love you” like a bouquet of half-price gas station flowers and a last-minute, on-sale box of chocolates. Romance on a budget, folks!
  2. Date nights: $100 – We’re talking about those fancy candlelit dinners at the finest fast-food establishments, complete with the extra-value meal and a shared soda. Classy, yet cost-effective.
  3. Movie outings: $40 – Catching the latest blockbuster movies on discount Tuesdays, armed with a smuggled-in bag of stale popcorn and a pocketful of expired coupons.
  4. Miscellaneous surprises: $30 – This includes those spontaneous moments of chivalry, like buying her a dollar store trinket or surprise serenading her with a kazoo rendition of her favorite song.
  5. Emotional support: Priceless – Because being there for each other during good times, bad times, and the “I can’t decide what to wear” times is invaluable. Cue the sentimental music.

See my full post How Much Does it Really Cost to Have a Girlfriend: A One-month Study

9. Make up a recipe that uses less four ingredients and takes less than 20 minutes start to finish

Ryan:

Sweet Baby Ray’s Barbecue Chicken Pizza

 Step 1: Start with pita bread— I’m really not seeing the difference between pita bread and pizza crust so let’s just stick with pita bread.

Step 2: Add pizza sauce, mozzarella cheese, and chicken

Step 3: Throw it in the oven for 15 minutes at 350 degrees

photo 1

ChatGPT:

Cheesy Pesto Chicken Skillet

  1. Preheat your skillet over medium-high heat.
  2. Season the chicken breasts with salt and pepper on both sides.
  3. Place the chicken breasts in the skillet and cook for about 5-6 minutes per side, or until they are cooked through and no longer pink in the center.
  4. Spread 2 tablespoons of pesto sauce on top of each chicken breast.
  5. Sprinkle the shredded mozzarella cheese evenly over the chicken breasts.
  6. Add the cherry tomato halves to the skillet, spreading them around the chicken.
  7. Cover the skillet with a lid and let it cook for an additional 3-4 minutes, or until the cheese has melted and the tomatoes are slightly softened.
  8. Remove the skillet from heat and let it cool for a minute or two.
  9. Serve the cheesy pesto chicken hot, and optionally garnish with fresh basil leaves for extra flavor.

See my full post How to Food: The One Where Ryan Learns How to Cook and Can Teach You Too

10. Create a Bingo board using action movie cliches

Ryan:

ChatGPT:

See my full post Bad Guy Bingo: A Summary of Every Action Movie Ever

Still not convinced? Check out these 10 reasons why you should follow my blog

DIY Projects at the Kelley House

Brittany and I (along with lots of help from our dads) are trying to learn some DIY skills. Here’s a look back at the past few months…

Replaced a rotten deck post (scroll through)

Replaced a leaking garbage disposal (which had started pouring water five minute before we were about to leave for our wedding)

Brittany spackled and painted over lots of dog scratches

Straightened the fence (scroll through)

Patched over some holes in the wall

Made some minor color adjustments

Installed a ceiling fan

And lots more– changed locks, replaced dishwasher hoses, installed a flood light, sealed the driveway, refinished furniture (in process), and changed/installed smoke detectors, among others.

The Story of Us

During my sophomore year of college, Jake McKinney gave me some great advice; “Always sit beside the prettiest girl in class.”

I soon found myself seated next to Brittany Simpson in Drama 116, “Perspectives in the Theater.” The class itself wasn’t all that interesting but it was still the highlight of my week to see Brittany two days a week from 9-10am. We’d pass notes, share answers, and giggle throughout the class. For our first unofficial date, we went to see “The Tempest” at Playmaker’s Theatre; a mandatory homework assignment for the class. During the second act, I finally worked up the courage to put my arm around her. Within a few minutes she was fast asleep with her head nestled into my shoulder. I knew this was something special but wasn’t exactly sure where we stood after the play… Had I really bored her to sleep?

Luckily, I knew Brittany was a volunteer tutor in the Spanish department. Even though Spanish had always been one of my best subjects, I swallowed my pride and signed up for homework tutoring with a special request to work with her. The effort was quickly rewarded as it turns out the feeling was mutual and Brittany had been looking for the perfect opportunity to invite me to the APO Christmas dance. By the end of the school year, I had successfully (awkwardly) asked Brittany to be my girlfriend and considered myself the luckiest guy in the world.

Unfortunately, this was just in time for the first major trial of our relationship as I was getting ready to spend six months studying abroad in Spain. We had just exchanged our very first “I love you’s” but were still worried about how the new relationship would endure across 4,000 miles. I’ll never forget crying in the airport as we promised to make it work. Despite the distance, we grew stronger and closer over time as we wrote letters so long it required extra postage. When Brittany asked me what I wanted for my birthday I didn’t hesitate saying, “Come visit me in Madrid.”

We graduated the following year and began our journey into adulthood together. This included another long distance stent as Brittany left for ECU’s PA school, but this time felt so much easier since it was only an hour and a half away. During most of my visits to Greenville, we’d end up at Coastal Fog coffee shop; Brittany studying diligently while I mindlessly browsed the internet. We still managed to fit in lots of exciting things too though, like celebrating St. Patrick’s Day in Dublin, climbing a 14,000 foot mountain in Colorado, and spending lots of time with friends and family. Life got even better in Dec. 2021 when Brittany graduated at the top of her class and we were finally reunited together in the same city… this time for good.

Being with Brittany has been the best eight years of my life but my favorite chapter is still to come.